by Rosanne Bowman, Lima, OH
This article appeared in The Lima News, October 15, 2014, and is reprinted by permission. Copyright 2014 The Lima News.
According to statistics gathered by Maranatha Life, an international ministry to pastors and Christian leaders, around 1,500 pastors leave the ministry every year. Those statistics also showed that 80 percent of pastors feel unqualified and discouraged in their role as pastors, and 50 percent of pastors are so discouraged, they would leave the ministry if they could make a living doing something else.
The Rev. Jerry Burton, pastor of counseling and discipleship at Lima Baptist Temple, said that pastoral care is one way to combat these statistics.
“Personal care needs to happen primarily because pastors don’t have a pastor,” said Burton, who has been in full-time ministry for 54 years. “They don’t have an outlet if a problem arises. They have no liberty to bare their soul to a member of the congregation.”
Because of this, many pastors do not stay in a church for very long.
“The average time a pastor stays in a church is two and a half to five years,” Burton said. “Either the conflict is so great, or they have never resolved previous issues no matter how many times they have moved and those issues keep coming up.”
The constant change of senior pastors in a church can be problematic for the congregation, as well. There is usually a transition period where the congregation and the new pastor and his or her family get used to each other. According to Burton, this can last anywhere from six month to two years.
“Because we view the church as a family,” he said, “it feels like Dad left and abandoned the family when the senior pastor leaves. Especially if the previous pastor has been there 20 or 30 years, you get the comparison game. Congregations can’t expect a carbon copy of the previous pastor. The new pastor needs to be able to minister using his own gifts and leadership styles.”
Pastoral care helps not just pastors and their families but also the congregations they serve. Burton has spent the last nine years working with Don Rooks in Connecting Point Ministry whose main focus is ministering to those in ministry. The organization holds international retreats for overseas missionaries and three ministry stress management conferences a year for pastors, missionaries and the adult children of those in fulltime ministry.
“We find that the children of ministry families often struggle with their view of God,” said Burton.
Each week-long conference begins at 3 p.m. Monday and goes through 11 a.m. Friday. There are morning and evening sessions that include group sessions where participants can discuss issues with others who are experiencing the same kinds of things. There are also one-on-one sessions on Tuesday and Thursday afternoons.
“Every facilitator — there are usually six — talks to every person attending in their area of specialty,” said Burton. “My wife Carol and I specialize in the spiritual gifts and temperament analysis.”
While there are other conferences out there, Burton said Connecting Point Ministry is unique because the conferences are free for attendees.
“The facilitators all pay their own way,” he said. “We give a week of our time, and we don’t get anything out of it except the satisfaction that we’ve helped.”
In the years Burton has been working with people in ministry, the biggest issue he sees is the difficulty pastors have in learning to balance work and family. He also sees marital conflict and unforgiveness as recurring issues among those in fulltime ministry.
“They think they are better and have moved on,” he said, “but unforgiveness can cloud their judgment and affect their ministry and their health.”
Of course, pastoral care involves more than spending a week at a conference once a year. Burton shared several things congregations can do to help their pastors. First, congregations should insist their pastor has a day off and they need to respect the pastor’s day off, so he or she can truly relax.
Burton also advised not putting the pastor and his or her family on a pedestal.
“They need to allow him to live a regular life, to have family time,” he said. “They need to let him be as human as possible.”
Burton added that if the congregation thinks the pastor has failed in some way, they need to first forgive the leader and then pray about it, rather than talk about it to others in the congregation.
He also suggested that the congregation consider giving their pastor a 30- to 90-day sabbatical every five to seven years.
“It will refresh his body and his mind,” said Burton.
Pastors also need the freedom to seek help if they need it. Those in leadership in the church should encourage a pastor to seek outside counsel or help if the pastor or his or her family are having problems in a specific area.
“Often,” said Burton, “pastors are afraid to share problems they are having because it becomes a threat to their leadership. They should be encouraged to get help without judgment.”
Finally, Burton said that congregants should pray for the pastor and his or her family regularly.
“They get attacks that are not like anyone else,” he said. “There are expectations on pastors that can’t ever be fulfilled.”
Editor’s Note: The BBFI Articles of Faith make clear the office of pastor is limited to men.