by Gwendolyn Weniger
Pastor’s wife, Woodbridge, Virginia
Do you like creepy crawly things? Recently, I was sitting in church listening to my husband preach and felt someone tangling with my hair. A large spider had crawled up the back of the pew and into my hair and the folks behind me had been watching it until someone finally decided to grab it! That’s one time when I was glad that everyone’s eyes were not glued on the preacher!
Although I don’t particularly care for creepy crawly things (and who does besides little boys?), I’m going to begin with “a lady”…
Ladybugs really are a “spiritual” insect, as you’ll see. Just like Christians who are to be humble, have a testimony, and are sometimes closer than family, ladybugs are among the most familiar beetles, easily recognized by their round, often spotted bodies, less than three-eights of an inch long. Yet, what variety!
There are two-spotted ladybugs, nine-spotted ladybugs, spotless-nine-spotted ladybugs, seven-spotted ladybugs, three-banded ladybugs, convergent ladybugs, ashy gray ladybugs…and on and on…whew!
Likewise, Christian women are individual, having differing gifts and characteristics. We have different colored eyes and hair, different shapes, personalities, temperaments, talents, situations, and circumstances.
And, different things bug us. So, let me ask, “What’s buggin’ you, lady?”
Life can be filled with irritations and annoyances which bug us. Jesus said in Luke 17:1a, “…It is impossible but that offences will come:”
But what a wonderful verse we have in Psalm 119:165: “Great peace have they which love thy law: and nothing shall offend them.:”
Because we are human (and, thus, imperfect) we will both give cause for offense and justify being offended. People simply bug other people…usually people who are close or even loved. So, how can we avoid the pitfalls of such offenses? (We don’t want impaired relationships due to misunderstandings. We’ve got to live with the people we live with!) Of course, changing jobs and churches and families every year is not a solution!
As women, we tend to blame our own irritability and intolerance on our gender. The Bible allows no such loophole! We are responsible for our own reactions to others, our behavior, our words, even our thoughts, and our attitudes. “So then every one of us shall give account of himself to God” (Romans 1:12).
First, some “ladybugs” are silly. For example, if someone is wearing your outfit, or if somebody is talking loudly on their cell phone in public, or if you’re waiting in line at a store and the clerk is chatting unnecessarily with the customer ahead of you, wasting your time…it bugs you! Remember what Proverbs 14:17a says, “He that is soon angry dealeth foolishly…”
Second, most “ladybugs” are symptomatic. In other words, there are irritations because one or both of the individuals are not right with God and fellowship is hindered. You know down deep if that is the case.
Pride keeps us from facing the true cause. Remember the good examples of Jehu and Jehonadab in 2 Kings “…and said unto him, Is thine heart right, as my heart is with thy heart? …It is. If it be, give me thine hand. And he gave him his hand…And he said, Come with me, and see my zeal for the Lord…” (2 Kings 10:15-16).
Third, a few “ladybugs” are serious. By this, I mean that God declares that sin is just that — an offense against Him and His holiness. This goes way beyond a pet peeve or an opinion.
Besides strife (Genesis 13:5-11), a contentious spouse (Proverbs 21:19), an angry person who infects others (Proverbs 22:24), or one who causes divisions (Romans 16:17), we must deal with real enemies. “Alexander the coppersmith did me much evil: the Lord reward him according to his works” (2 Timothy 4:14). So, leave “Alexander” in God’s capable hands! Then, give God your own heart, mind, and tongue to guard. Why? Because, “When a man’s ways please the LORD, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him” (Proverbs 16:7).
So, women, what are we going to do about these “ladybugs”? “…Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; that ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven…” (Matthew 5:44, 45).
Gwendolyn Weniger is the wife of Brad Weniger, pastor of Central Baptist Church of Woodbridge, Virginia. They have been married and in the ministry for 39 years. They have two grown, married sons and one grandson.